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Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Good Luck Chuck (2007)


* Dane Cook - Charlie/Chuck
* Jessica Alba - Cam Wexler
* Jodelle Ferland - Lila Carpenter
* Dan Fogler - Stu
* Annie Wood - Lara
* Chelan Simmons - Carol
* Crystal Lowe - Wedding Guest #1
* Steve Bacic - Howard
* Carrie Fleming - Sharon Belmont
* Troy Gentile - Young Stu
* Georgia Craig - Marilyn Blaine
* Sasha Pieterse - Goth Girl
* Lindsay Maxwell - Cam's Friend
* Tava Smiley - Nicole
* Simone Bailly - Megan
* Liam James - Little Boy in Habitat
* Agam Darshi - Wedding Guest #3
* Ben Ayres - Groomsman
* Connor Price - Young Charlie
* Lonny Ross - Joe Wexler
* Zara Taylor - Amanda
* Ellia English - Reba
* Victoria Bidewell - Sane Woman
* Cody Klop - Teenage boy (voice)
* Caroline Ford - Jennifer
* Mackenzie Mowat - Britta Carmichael
* June B. Wilde - Actress
* Ed Welch - Sharon's Man
* Jodie Stewart - Eleanor Skipp

When Chuck (Dane Cook) refused to kiss a goth girl when he was ten years old, she placed a curse on him: every single woman he sleeps with will break up with him and marry the next man she meets. Chuck soon realizes this pattern and becomes hopeful that single women will seek him out as a date, so they will soon find Mr. Right. He then meets Cam Wexler (Jessica Alba), a lovable but clumsy penguin trainer. However, he finds himself in a conundrum, as she constantly tries to convince him to have sex, something he tries to avoid because he doesn't want her to marry someone else. After made to believe the "curse" is fake, Charlie soon has sex with Cam. After realizing that she might fall in love with someone else, Charlie does everything it takes for her to stay with him. From stalking her at her workplace, to jumping into a penguin suit and serenading her.

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Resident Evil 3 (2007)

Years after the Raccoon City disaster, Alice (MILLA JOVOVICH) is on her own; aware that she has become a liability and could endanger those around her, she is struggling to survive and bring down the Umbrella Corporation led by the sinister Albert Wesker (JASON O'MARA) and head researcher Dr. Isaacs (IAN GLEN). Meanwhile, traveling through the Nevada Desert and the ruins of Las Vegas, Carlos Olivera (ODED FEHR), L.J. (MIKE EPPS), and new survivors K-Mart (SPENCER LOCKE), Claire Redfield(ALI LARTER), and Nurse Betty (ASHANTI) must fight to survive extinction against hordes of zombies, killer crows and the most terrifying creatures created as a result of the deadly T-Virus that has killed millions.

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Part 1
Part 2
Part 3

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Monday, September 17, 2007

Mr. Woodcock (2007)


* Billy Bob Thornton as Mr. Jasper Woodcock
* Seann William Scott as John Farley
* Susan Sarandon as Beverly Farley
* Ethan Suplee as Nedderman
* Amy Poehler as Maggie Hoffman

While growing up, John Farley (Seann William Scott) and many of his classmates were tormented by a sadistic and ogreish monster of a gym teacher named Mr. Jasper Woodcock (Billy Bob Thornton). Things have since turned out quite well for John, who has gone on to become a successful self-help author and motivational speaker. When he hears that his hometown community wants to reward him for his achievements, he returns thinking that his painful memories of torment are now buried and long behind him. To his surprise and horror, Mr. Woodcock, the man that humiliated and insulted him for years, is now dating his widowed mother Beverly (Susan Sarandon). Even worse, the two lovebirds are engaged to be married. Determined not to let Mr. Woodcock ruin his life again, John sets out to prevent the nuptials from taking place by sabotaging his former teacher any way he can.

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Part 1: First Scene
Part 2: Second Scene
Part 3: Third Scene

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Sunday, September 16, 2007

I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry (2007)

Chuck Levine (Adam Sandler) and Larry Valentine (Kevin James) are veteran New York firefighters. Chuck is a womanizer and a self-described whore while Larry is a single father trying to raise a daughter and an effeminate son Eric (Cole Morgen). Because of Larry's sadness and obsession over his wife's death, he ends up not changing the primary beneficiary of his pension from his wife to his children within the deadline. His only option is to marry someone but Larry admits that there is no woman he knows that he would trust with his children's future.

While on a routine search of a burned house, Chuck is left hanging for his life. Larry catches Chuck and shields him from falling boards from the fragile floor above. They wake up in the hospital and Larry is struck by the reaction of his children being again in the hospital where their mother died. Larry decides to quit being a fireman because he’s afraid of dying and leaving his kids alone. While thinking it over, Larry finds an article about same-sex domestic partnership rights and decides to "marry" Chuck, making him the beneficiary and caretaker of Larry's children. Chuck is reluctant but gives in since Larry saved his life.

After registering their domestic partnership, a beneficiary office lawyer comes to talk to Chuck and Larry to verify their domestic partnership. Chuck and Larry put on an act and the lawyer quickly leaves, hinting that a surprise inspection may come in the future by a much more thorough person.

Chuck and Larry meet with their lawyer Alex McDonough (Jessica Biel). Alex tells the two that a specialist is indeed being sent in to see if Chuck and Larry are frauds; if they are faking being gay, them and anyone who knows about their lie will go to jail. She suggests they legitimize their relationship by truly getting married. Following her advice they elope and marry in Canada, since same-sex marriage in New York is not possible. Chuck then moves in with Larry.

After Chuck's first morning with Larry, Larry goes outside and finds Clinton Fitzer (Steve Buscemi), the specialist sent in to see if they’re faking being gay. He remarks that their trash is not very gay and leaves.

While shopping for more “gay stuff”, Chuck runs into Alex and she invites Chuck and Larry to a costume party that night. During the flamboyant party, the pair meet Alex's hyperactive gay brother, Kevin (Nick Swardson). After the party ends, the party-goers are confronted by a anti-gay rights group. The activists get into verbal arguments with the gays, culminating in activist leader Jim (Rob Corddry) calling them faggots. Chuck gets offended and punches Jim. The altercation makes its way to the newspaper tabloids the next day.

The next morning, Chuck and Larry are called to speak with FDNY Captain Phineas J. Tucker (Dan Aykroyd) who has seen through their scheme and warns them that if they get caught, they are not to bring the firehouse down with them. Chuck and Larry find themselves not accepted well by the other firemen. No one will play basketball, Larry has been asked not to coach Little League anymore, and Larry gets asked a lot of crude homosexual questions when he makes an appearance for his kids’ Career Day. While playing alone, Chuck is confronted by Fred Duncan (Ving Rhames), a newcomer quiet angry firefighter rumored to be an axe murderer. Chuck fears the worst but Duncan opens up to Chuck and admits that he acts mean because he has been in the closet for so long.

Chuck is getting to know Alex and spends time with her in a 'girl-girl' relationship exemplified by their friendship bracelets. She begs for him to rub and massage her feet which he was reluctant but decided to do so. One day, while Chuck is convinced to give love advice to Alex they end up passionately kissing. Alex backs out and apologizes for kissing a gay married man who's her client. Chuck claims he’s never felt this way about a woman before, but Alex tells him to leave.

While rescuing a man stuck in a chimney, Chuck and Larry get into an argument. Chuck tells Larry that because of the partnership, he can't get close to Alex and the whole situation would never have happened if Larry had put his dead wife behind him and found a nice woman to marry. To make matters worse, a petition signed by the firefighters has been signed to get Chuck and Larry to transfer from the station. Tucker refuses to remove Chuck and Larry, but instead moves them to different shifts so they can no longer work together. Larry confronts each of the signers and is disgusted by how people he saved, helped, and taught have betrayed him.

Back home, Larry sees Chuck nurturing Larry son's talent for tap dancing and musicals. Larry throws out his wife's clothing and apologizes to Chuck for everything.

Meanwhile, tabloids pick up on Chuck and Larry's case and their court case becomes a media spectacle. Inside the courthouse, Chuck and Larry confront the other firefighters who apologize and vow to stand with Chuck and Larry. During the court case, Chuck and Larry are grilled with personal questions. After testimony by Larry's children, the case looks to be firmly on Chuck and Larry's side. In a last ditch attempt, Clint asks the couple to kiss. After convincing by the audience, they attempt to kiss but are interrupted by Captain Tucker who admits that they are lying and his part in it but tells the judges that their lie has helped everyone around them and hurt no one. Clint convinces the judge that it doesn't matter since they still broke the law. In a Spartacus-inspired sequence, the firefighters all lie and claim that they helped Chuck and Larry break the law and should also be jailed.

Unfortunately, they are actually all thrown in jail. Councilman Banks (Richard Chamberlain) shows up and tells Chuck and Larry he'll drop all charges under two conditions: the firefighters all have to make a gay calendar because Chuck and Larry are still heroes to the gay community (plus it would also act as an effective fundraiser for AIDS prevention), and they have to admit that what they did was illegal, and the council will dismiss it as a misdemeanor.

Later, Duncan and Kevin get married at the same wedding chapel in Canada. At the reception, Larry is seen talking to a woman while Chuck goes over and talks to Alex. Chuck is uncertain if Alex has forgiven him so Alex shows him she still has the friendship bracelet they made tied around her ankle, and they end up dancing together.

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Mini's First Time (2007)

Desperate to be free from her drunken, unloving mother Diane, the beautiful, scheming young Mini seduces her stepfather Martin and soon convinces him to join her in a sadistic scheme to have Diane declared insane. But their conspiracy soon escalates to murder and when John Garson, a young detective starts investigating, Martin and Mini begin to turn on each other.

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Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Hatchet (2007)

Stay out of the swamp.
Adam Green's Hatchet is a return to the good ol' days of horror, when scares weren't computer-generated, when gallons of fake blood were splashed on trees, when men were men (until things got scary, at which point they squealed like little girls), women were scantily clad, and boys were deformed psychopaths with a taste for unique weaponry.

It's Mardi Gras in New Orleans, and Ben (Joel David Moore) has reached booze and boobs overload. Recently dumped and pining after his girlfriend, he enlists his pal Marcus (Deon Richmond) to accompany him on a swamp tour in a boat that travels the spooky murk surrounding the city. Marcus is less than enthused until the crew of the low, low, low (low) budget movie "Bayou Beavers" signs on, including amateur cameraman Shapiro (Joel Murray), pneumatic Misty (Mercedes McNab) and ditzy Jenna (Joleigh Fioreavanti). Joining them on the rickety cruiser are the painfully wholesome couple Mr. and Mrs. Permatteo (Richard Riehle and Patrika Darbo) and the beautiful-but-sullen Marybeth (Tamara Feldman).

Led by the P.T. Barnum of the swamp tour industry, fast-talking but slow-thinking showboater Shawn (Parry Shen) the tourists are decidedly underwhelmed by the fog, low-hanging branches and aggressively quiet sounds that Shawn tries to pass off as frightening. He launches into the story of Victor Crowley - yup, a legend in these parts - who is known to haunt the swamp. The boaters wave off the story as part of Shawn's continuing nonsense - except for Marybeth, who is notably discomforted.

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Tuesday, September 11, 2007

UnderDog 2007

Disney and Spyglass Entertainment have recreated Underdog, the classic cartoon series from Saturday mornings about a loveable mutt, and expanded a vague, but interesting concept into a full-length feature. Talking dogs included.

An unnamed beagle (voiced by Jason Lee) is captured and locked away in the fortified laboratory used by Simon Barsinister (played by Peter Dinklage (1)) and his thesaurus-reliant henchman Cad (Patrick Warburton). The animal escapes near-tampering of his doggy DNA and begins running around the lab room at top speeds, ears a flapping. The chase comes to a halt when the beagle crashes into a shelf of glass beakers and unidentifiable liquids, spilling a monster Molotov cocktail over our friend’s fur, imbuing him with an encyclopedia of superpowers. This biochemical shower provides the dog with animal abilities that far surpass his own, flight, strength, speed, etc.

The film’s first of many subtexts is clearly a cinematic preamble to the Underdog story that I watched as an eight-year-old (2). As a young tyke, I never cared how Underdog became empowered. All I knew was the hero downed an energy pill and suddenly gained enough power to be a one-dog wrecking crew. But this back story is clearly an attempt to drag the old-school cartoon narrative into the realms of contemporary context and to distill the continuity down to plotline A follows plotline B (plus it all subtexts included it probably adds another forty minutes to what would be the equivalent length of a day-time soap opera.

James Unger (played by James Belushi), a one-time cop who quit the force and become the new nightwatchman at Barsinister’s lab (3), finds the beagle in the streets (and by finding him I mean running him over with a car, but luckily the dog’s uninjured) and brings the wayward quadruped home, hoping to offer the beagle up as a gift to his teenage son. At home we see the true struggle of a single parent on a low- to mid-level income strive for the affection of an only child. Unger is a defunct cop-turned-security guard, who quit his cop gig to spend time with his son, a teen truant who wants little to do with his middle-aged old man. The dog, nicknamed Shoeshine for his propensity to lick Unger’s shoes, quickly garners the affection of James’ son, Jack, (Alex Neuberger) a loner kid with few friends save one peer, Molly (Taylor Momsen), the journalista-next-door with Bambi eyes and a slight come-hither attitude that sucks Jack right in. She’s a good kid, and an aspiring reporter, always looking for the next story. Jack’s on the constant search for notoriety, a little fame, some attention, and he soon figures man’s best friend might be that meal ticket even if he has to live vicariously through the dog’s exploits. It’s evident that Jack has a thing for Molly. And Shoeshine falls for Molly’s dog, Polly Purebred, animal of same name as Underdog’s love interest in the cartoon series.

Jack quickly learns that he’s not alone when he discovers Shoeshine’s ability to talk, among other talents such as wrecking his dad’s house and leaving giant messes lying around (4). The pair develop Shoeshine’s hero identity after the beagle foils a jewel robbery orchestrated by Barsinister to help pay for his experiments. Realizing that Shoeshine is their dog, the two formulate a calculated plan (which indirectly works out) to capture the canine crusader again to extract his DNA and create more doses of what turned Shoeshine into a superhero.

While watching Underdog, we’re constantly reminded of the “great power, great responsibility” mantra (5). As Shoeshine’s the reluctant hero just coming to grips with being an intelligent and articulate dog with some extra get-up-and-go. Eventually, the beagle’s talked into undergoing the costumed identity and Underdog is born.

Of course Jack and his juiced companion continue on with their exploits, but most of the movie follows the simple plotline of the cartoon. The film introduces all the main characters of the animated series –- Underdog/Shoeshine, Polly, Barsinister and his henchman Cad, and even Riff Raff, the canine gangster — while including the new characters of James and Jack Unger, and Molly, placing them in danger on separate occasions, only so Underdog can make the ultimate sacrifice to free his new-found friends (6).

It’s easy to hate a film for what it’s doing: poaching a childhood favorite. How many Rocky and Bullwinkle or Garfield movies does it take before Hollywood finally says enough? However, Underdog gets from beginning to end with a seamless thread, while unraveling subplot after subplot, enough to keep a young child occupied for just under an hour and a half. Sure, the adults in the theater who grew up on Underdog will find some fault with the movie, but children should love Underdog. He’s a hero, he’s a regular dog, and he makes tough decisions for the right reasons.

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